I’ve been gone from LaBu for many months now. And am, now, returning tomorrow night. For what may be a very long time. That wasn’t the plan, but plans are nothing if not metamorphic little bastards. And so.
I’m also returning with Charlemagne le Chat. Charlie doesn’t seem all that excited about the plane trip, or even the chance to renew his iffy relationships with the neighbourhood felines. But then, his interests these days are much as they’ve always been: food and snuggles, and more recently, trying mightily to intimidate his younger sister (who being both an adopted Tbilisian street cat, and a decade plus younger, regards such activities as an invitation to play, Play, PLay, PLAy PLAY!). He (and I) are going to hate the trip, but welcome the destination. Not, I know, an experiential mindset, but one borne of a lot of pandemic and near-end-pandemic airtime as well as plenty of already experienced experience of Cats In Flight.
But, what, oh-what, will I do on my return? I’ve a list, you wanna’ see it? I mean, are you sure? Because every time I look at it I break into a bout of hysterical laughter that leaves me if not hoping for death, at least on the sharp lookout for a bottle of whiskey.
The At-The-Moment-List-For-The-LaBuRedo:
Upstairs
- Address possible crack in chimney cap
- Install baseboards
- Install floorboard joints
- Plaster guest room
- Paint guest room ceiling
- Paint vertical walls
- Clean and treat beams
- Build + Install bathroom countertop
- Tile backsplash
- Purchase + install light above sink
- Screen dormer windows
- Install balcony door mosquito mesh
- Stain glass owl hole
- Colored glass dovecotes
- Finish arch between bedroom and salon in royal apartments
- Sand + stain + treat stairs into royal apartments
- Install curtains between stairs and royal apartments
- Install little piece of flooring in landing
- Treat doors for guest room and bathroom
- Redo/repair placo and plaster at chimney peaks
- Install stairs
- Finishing woodwork around stairs
Sitting room/library
- Finish installation + sanding + oil floors
- Plaster walls
- Install baseboards
- Remove lime behind woodburner
- Finish grouting/tiling around woodburner
- Install screens
- Bookcases
- Audit ceiling
- TuShu signet on mantle
- Install curtain rods on doors
Kitchen/dining/mud/bathroom
- Lime plaster patches to stone walls
- Framing for placko
- Framing for insulation
- First fix electrics
- Travertine flooring
- Treat travertine
- Placo
- Plaster walls
- Paint
- Final fix electrics
- Purchase sink for bathroom
- Purchase sink for kitchen
- Purchase toilet
- Purchase shower
- Purchase small towel rack for bathroom
- Purchase small towel rack for kitchen
- Install bathroom fixtures
- Install washer/dryer
Cuisinaire
- Foundation
- Framing
- Glazing
- Counters
- Stove
- Roofing
- Final finish on doorway into kitchen
Exterior house
- Downspouts and drainage
- Southeast: plastic lined stone ‘river’ to the south?
- Northeast: remove raised bed/move retaining wall along walkway/driveway. Downspout to lead into water feature with stone riverbed leading into hedge/along driveway
- Gravel load in front of front door – after major works/truck traffic
- Shutters
- Treatment of wood (lintels, doors, window)
- Soffits around roof
- Retaining wall on south side
- Complete North walkway
Garden House
- Repair leak in ceiling
- Build wood store (S-side)
- Demo wall
- Placo + insulate ceiling
- Add window(s)?
- Sand + treat (poly) floor
- Remove moss from roof
- Hardscape solution
- Treat exterior surfaces
Misc Outside
- Balance + lock driveway gate
- Build +install pedestrian gate
ANYONE who has been through this before, knows that it will only get more absurd as I spend some time wandering around in those rare moments when I’m not actually removing moss, or trying to steer a sander that if it hasn’t actually reached sentience and is making a run for the door, will be acting like it, or gods-help-me directing my attention to the substantial groundworks that come next, will grow. I know. Any peat-laden Scottish whiskey will do if you’d like to send some along.
I may have forgotten to mention that we’re doing away with gas or electric cooking, and going all to wood. The not-entirely-necessary result of which is that we’re also building an extension to the kitchen to house the wood-burning stove and, well, wood. And I swear, if le maître d’ouvrage C hadn’t been around to conceive of the plans, shepherd those plans through the Gallic Bureaucracy, and then find people with appropriate skill and equipment (not least of which, himself), we’d be building a lean-to out of pine branches and recycled aluminium siding. What we’re doing ain’t that. So, there, something to stay-tuned for.
And so, I’m off. More from la France profond in the new month.
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